Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
Found plan b box covered with blood. In kitchen sick. Pickle jar is empty. Wtf happened?
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
She tried to beat the waitress over the head with a bread stick because one of her martini olives was missing a pimento. All while screaming "IT'S GAMEDAY BITCH"
Olive Garden will never be the same.
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
Randomize
