Im bringing wine tonight. Its from a merlot from nashville. i bet it'll taste like infidelity and teenage pregnancy.
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
You text me last night that you invented a new food. Cheese-less grilled cheese. Congrats, you made toast.
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
Randomize
