how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
please stop taking shits in my toilet and leaving them there.
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
Hey
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GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
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