all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
literally just tried sending to someone a video of me jerkin but my phone was connected to Apple TV and it literally just played on the tv in a full room and I'm actually about to shit myself
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
Sorry my phone died. Obviously four o'clock in the morning is a good time to tell you this.
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
My Mormon mother just found a butt-plug in our AirBnB closet.
Randomize
