Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
so it turns out that "condoms galore" does, indeed, come up on your bank statement
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
A little boy in a bathroom stall just shouted "mom where's your penis?? Is it inside you?"
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
Randomize
