Yea, forget your mom. She will be home after her one night stand.
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
Is her dick bigger than yours?
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
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