Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
I finished my first whiskey and I'm waiting to have a second one in celebration when your pregnancy test comes back negative
Randomize