he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
woke up naked, spooning with wine bottle.. and my video chat was still open. fuck, not again.
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
Why the HOLY HELL is my dog on my roof??? Sam?? Why is the dog wearing my pants
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
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