I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
I just face planted on a condom wrapper in my bed...thought of you.
You're so romantic.
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
He wore the same cologne as my orthodontist so all I could think about was how I hadn't worn my retainer in months
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
My Mormon mother just found a butt-plug in our AirBnB closet.
Randomize
