He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
He woke me up at 5am to recite nursery rhymes to our fictitious unborn child.
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
He says I vaguely mumbled happy New year, kissed him, threw up and then went back to sleep.
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
Randomize