Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
He booked his flight from Dallas already, no ticket to the game, said hes gonna bang some girl at tailgait to get a ticket, I had to explain that it will be sub 20 degrees F during tailgate, he decided to come in july instead, Texans are dumb.
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
Hey, you remember years ago when you told me you would give me a kidney?
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
Randomize
