Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
Tell me why I woke up spooning a hamburger like it was a teddy bear.
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
Guy hitting on me at bar is guy who's Craigslist ad we laughed at the other night. Not even kidding.
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
Randomize