True but thats because hes a fetus.
I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
Randomize
