Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
I wish I could like. Pull my liver out, and put it in the corner of a boxing ring, put a towel and ice on it, rub it's shoulders, and tell it to "get back in there, you got this!".
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
Went up to some dude that hit on Laura and told him he has a voice like a grandma. Apparently didnt have muscles or kindness like grandma so can you pick me up at the ER please?
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
Randomize
