I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
ecstacy + fleshlight = not all that upset about being newly single anymore
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
This Pinterest wedding planning is a good distraction. I'm great at this, my imaginary wedding is beautiful
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
Randomize