Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together.
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
Randomize
