I'm drinking on the job... HEAVILY
You're earring is so big in my mouth
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
Come over and play the Jeter 3000 drinking game. You drink if the commentators say "captain" or "3000". I'll drink if they say "overrated" or "past his prime".
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
We are planning a drunk snapchat treasure hunt for tomorrow, and the treasure is his penis, this is a game I'm not willing to loose.
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
He sent me a snapchat of him singing wrecking ball. Guess what the wrecking ball was. Hint: he literally came.
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
Randomize
