That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
I was in the bathroom and heard my brother scream "YOU FAIL!!!", and I swear to GOD, I thought my penis was yelling at me.
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
I want an apology pizza with SORRY IM A DOUCHE spelled out on it in pepperoni
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
Randomize
