this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
He just walked up to me in the kitchen, pulled out his penis and stuck it in my sweatpants pocket.
It was probably cold. Sweatpants pockets are notoriously warm.
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
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