All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
They never prepare you for how broke ur gonna be in college. I just accepted money from two underage girls at a gas station to buy them beer only because I'm trying to figure out a way to run off with it without them noticing.
Dude, use it to buy them beer. Then run the beer to ur car as fast as you can and bring it to the party. Seriously, we're running out of booze over here
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
Randomize
