Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
You know its bad when you're praying for a hangover just so you aren't still drunk at work anymore.
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
Matt just took me to visit my puke stain from 2 weeks ago at the train station...I'm fucking impressive
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
I told her the party couldn't handle my playlist LAZERBAWLS and I was right. Cops in the basement, orgy in the kitchen, jousting in the living room.
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
Just brought out that old CCM hockey helmet. The one covered in sharpie penises with "DRUNK BUCKET" written across the front. The number of tally marks / initials from tonight's drunk stunts alone is equal parts inspiring and alarming.
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
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