i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
I was to drunk to walk in jimmy john's so I called and got a pickle delivered to me outside the bar , too much?
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
Listen, she cheated on him first. I've known both of them since we were 12. They have no secrets from me. And yes, as a matter of fact, I absolutely did enjoy screaming out his name into his, soon to be, ex wife's pillow.
Randomize
