I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
Tell her she's as useless as a condom.
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
If I was gonna be at your campus for halloween weekend, I'd dress up as the masked horny fairy and give out condoms. I'm so thoughtful.
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
Randomize