Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
my grand plan for the evening is to do shots of vodka til i cant anymore
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
she was stuffing dove chocolates in my mouth while giving me a blow job. GOD I LOVE VALENTINES DAY
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
Your ass just called me, someone was yelling "awful waffle" and also, " I don't know who's hands are who's anymore"
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night
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