Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
I made a wizard staff out of Keystone light... I am therefore the smoothest wizard in all of our university's history.
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
Do you know how much wine is in a box of wine? Not so much an amount, but whether it will kill me if I drink the entire box this xmas
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
I'm dying of laughter, but I'm also just dying
Send help
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
Randomize
