i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
Trial is expected to last a fucking week if I get chosen.
To be fair, you are the kind of person I want to be on the jury when I inevitably end up in front of one.
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
I don't believe in coincidence. I believe in the stars aligning perfectly to sodomise me in public. Who ever said I was cynical?
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
And the view of you in reverse cowgirl is arguably the most spectacular view ever... And I've seen the Eiffle tower, the colosseum, mountains of Hawaii, Michaelangelo's David, and the Mona Goddamn Lisa. Just saying.
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
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