when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
You said your face felt like it was made out out of boxes and kept asking me to give you a bath.
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
Like when your most normal sex dream is you being a prostitute, you know it's been one long ass dry spell.
Randomize
