I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
while you were getting the key to the dorm from the lobby i was giving a drunk monolog to the security camera about my life
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
My loniness meter has reached its peak. I just played shadow puppets using my Big Mac on the wall with my cats
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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