ya know if you hadnt broke up with me, that porno we made wouldnt have a 3.3 rating on youporn right now...
I almost hooked up with this girl last night. she had a tattoo of a cardinal next to her cooter. said it reminded her of her grandpa
What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
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