She went to the bathroom before i broke up with her so i changed all 2500 of her songs on her computer to "I'm a cheating whore"
Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
Just got a motivational speech from the tacobell drive thru guy at 2am
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
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