I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
The cards I get dealt on tinder now are karma for fucking a married man while I was in high school.
Randomize
