fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
I had to explain the gravity bong to my mom. Right after she pointed out I have a lot of dicks on my floor at any given moment.
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
After you puked in the bathtub you claimed you were never eating quesadillas again and you never even ate a quesadilla
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
I'd just like to take a moment now to apologize sincerely for getting drunk and making an as of myself at your Christmas party next week. I'm especially sorry for sleeping with your baby sister.
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
Randomize
