if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
I'm going to write a letter. It's going to say, Dear Every Girl Ever: Take some goddam initiative and wake me up with a blowjob and I will eat out of your hand. Love, Every Guy Ever
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever.
I HAVE A BLACK EYE FROM A DILDO!! IM GETTING MARRIED TOMORROW! THIS IS NOT A MISSUNDERSTANDING!
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
i don't remember much about your party last weekend but i remember you being so drunk you were crying in your driveway about pickles at four am
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
there is another microwave in the elevator.
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
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