Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
It's a gateway drink.... Starts with wine... Then I wake up in my car with mascara on my arms covered in french fries...
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
If you put those two in a room together it'd be like a Taylor Swift fantasy and an Adele nightmare just licking faces
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
"Where are you? Where are my keys? What is this guys name again? Why am I wearing two pairs of your pants?"
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
My dad told me that my grandparents are giving me $20,000 and my actual response was "do you know how many kittens I could buy with that?!?"
Randomize
