If my vag had twitter, what do you think it would say?
I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
You left me on the phone while you grabbed a plastic bag and started puking. I recorded it. Its my new ringtone for you
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
Randomize
