Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
Fell off bed. Face first. 10 stitches. huge scar on forehead. totally going to start telling ppl my parents died fighting Voldemort.
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
You realize your sleeping pills are working when you pick up your iPhone and almost bite it because you thought it was a graham cracker
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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