He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
Just saw a cop give four blondes gas for their car on their way to Vegas. They seriously ran out of gas and called 911 about it. Its like a porno plot.
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
Out of desperation, I used the leftover sauce from my goat masala as a mixer for vodka shots.
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
Just woke up in a Price Chopper bathroom stall with a half eaten cake on the floor. Had to get a ride from the waitress I made out with. What happened to "Don't let me drink Tequila?"
I lied.
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