But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned.
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
Shit. She's still hooking up with some random in the doorway. How do I get out of here?
Well hurry! Everybody is already at McDonalds.
I'm free! Didnt realize how easy it was to crawl out the window.
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
Randomize
