i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
Sooo, drunk me had the sense of mind to write down everything that happened last night.....I bet you thought you'd get away with what you did to my parrot.
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
Some guy offered you 100 bucks last night to suck your toes. I had to drag you away while you were yelling at me, "Stop money cock blocking me!"
That's just where I'm at in my life.
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
lol hangovers are for mortals.
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
He unliked all of my pictures on instagram, I don't know whats worse, the fact that he did it or the fact that I noticed..
I'm at home, drunk, and I just called the guy I lost my virginity to and invited him to my wedding.. I've got to stop drinking by myself.
Randomize
