Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
I swear if his heart was half the size of the cum stains he's left on my sheets we would have the perfect relationship
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
It was 3 am when she drunkenly tried to deep-fry a banana.
How'd she do that?
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
Randomize
