I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
Randomize
