Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
Can we please have a moment of silence for my reputation?
Just realized the fur coat I am wearing to the wedding is the one I had sex with the groom in
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
all time personal low: room service guy going "You want french fries AND onion rings???"
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
You know that if they offer you a bagel they are determined to sleep with you, right?
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
Randomize
