no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
Someone is giving away free yogurt on craigslist. Can I get a ride?
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
i told him the only way i'd fuck him was if he saved me during the zombie apocolypse and took me to a tastefully decorated yet impenetrable hideout.
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
Nothing ruins your day more than waking up to you dogs crotch in your face
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