you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
I recall trading my iPhone watch for a carton of Marlboros.
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
Randomize
