oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
I finally got the glitter off in time to get to the party and bang the bday boy in the bathroom while his girlfriend was lighting the bday cake candles.
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
His gf just liked my changed relationship status. She's gonna shit bricks when she finds out he left her for me. Bless her little heart.
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
Randomize
