what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
Just checked my missed calls... why did you call me 37 times from 2:14 to 3:58?
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
bringing my vibrator into the shower with me. if I don't text back in 30 minutes I have electrocuted myself and died.
May the force be with you.
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
I am really drunk and also a zombie.
Randomize
