I'm drive I can fine osifer
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
It's 2pm, and I just had to pass a guy in the turning lane because he was driving down Main Street in an electric wheelchair pulling a flatbed trailer with 2 of his buddies in it and they were all drunk holding beers.
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
You would seriously think I would remember who put themselves in my phone as Burt Rynalds Moustache, but I don't. And I need to be reminded of who you are so I can give you a proper high five.
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
Randomize
