We named our party play list daddy issues
I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
Look, all I'm sayin is $2 boilermakers and an expense account are probably a bad mix…
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
hey fuckhead. when i said not to grow shrooms in our apartment, that didn't mean "yea, sure. grow shrooms in our apartment"
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
Woke up this morning with a darth vader helmet and a bath robe on with my toenails shitly painted
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
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