I left the party when things started to get crazy... and when I say crazy I mean: there was puke on the carpet, Evan was passed out behind a plant, Mary was making out with her ex while her present bf was making out with Nancy. Not to mention that someone fisted the wall. Also - someone is sleeping on your lawn - they might be dead, I didn't check. Later.
i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
this girl and her friend just showed up at my house. standing together, theylook exactly like the number 10. this has cockblock written alllllll over it.
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
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