I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
are you serious? he told me he had to cancel bc his grandma came into town
well unless his grandma is 21 and blonde, HE LIED TO YOU IDIOT
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
Steaks?
It's Ash Wednesday.
If you really think that not eating meat on a weeknight is going to keep you out of hell, fine. Can I use that chimichurri you made?
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
Why do all my exes just become Tom Hanks in Castaway?
That's a fantastic question. And an odd set of criteria to meet if wanting to date you.
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
Randomize
